


Falling

by tordarroch



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst and Porn, Armpit Kink, Barebacking, Blackwatch Era, Emotional Hurt, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, Pre-Fall of Overwatch, Shower Sex, implied McReyes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-30
Updated: 2017-09-30
Packaged: 2019-01-07 06:27:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12227421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tordarroch/pseuds/tordarroch
Summary: Jack knew he couldn't trust himself when it came to Jesse McCree.





	Falling

**Author's Note:**

> at the start of this fic, jesse and gabe are having an argument and i actually have no idea what it's about so jack's confusion is also my confusion.

Jack could hear the argument before he had entered the room. He’d seen a number of recruits fleeing the mess hall whilst mumbling to themselves. None of them would make eye contact, let alone give him any kind of answer, but he knew there was only one person on the entire base that could make people run like that. 

“Gabe, what the-” He started, opening the door only to see something that more closely resembled any one of his old warzones. Tables were flipped, chairs broken, trays on the floor, food on the walls and amongst it all was Jesse McCree, sat silently on a chair with his arms folded and an adamant look on his face. “Jesse?” 

He ducked down as soon as he saw Jesse twitch, just in time to see a bottle of water fly over his own head and hit Jesse square in the jaw. What had he walked into? Part of him wished he’d just kept walking. No, actually, all of him wished he had just kept walking but he never could keep his nose out of things. 

“McCree, you better fucking apologise right now,” came a booming voice, and Jack found himself spinning around just in time to see Blackwatch Commander Gabriel Reyes duck behind a potted plant to hide, another bottle of water ready in his hand. This was the same Gabriel Reyes who Jack trusted with his life. That Gabriel Reyes. Crouching down, avoiding a handful of flying food, something Jack hoped was mash potato. This was what his esteemed colleague had become, a babysitter for childish criminals. 

Jack took a step to the side, not wanting to get his own outfit dirty. 

“I ain’t got nothin’ to apologise for! Now fuck off! You told me to sit here until I’m ready to apologise an’ guess what, I ain’t apologisin’ an’ I ain’t movin’ so that makes this my house an’ I don’t want visitors!” Jesse yelled at a volume Jack didn’t know he possessed, not that he actually knew much about the kid.

Well, at least he pretended he didn’t. On the surface, he was Strike Commander Morrison, of Overwatch fame, and he had little to do with Blackwatch or its recruits. He knew their names, ranks, and preferred weapons, but not much else.

But under that, he was just Jack, and Gabriel was his best friend. Despite tensions, he still regarded his friend highly, and that meant that he found himself taking an interest in whatever Gabriel did. Or who he did. Jack wasn’t stupid, knew the relationship between Jesse and Gabriel was something more, and he found himself becoming increasingly jealous - and if he was entirely honest, not of Jesse.

He’d reached the obvious conclusion at first, that he was in love with his best friend. It made sense. Gabriel was ridiculously attractive and that body - that body, fuck, it certainly had fueled a number of long sessions with his hand, but there was nothing beyond the physical aspect. He knew Gabriel too well. He loved him as a friend, nothing more. Although, if Gabriel propositioned him, he would have a hard time saying no but he found himself thinking that about almost anyone these days. 

So he wasn’t jealous that Jesse had Gabriel. No, it was just the opposite. He was jealous of Gabriel. Jealous that he had Jesse because deep down, under all the bullshit personas he had created, he had feelings for Jesse McCree - the Jesse McCree who was Gabriel’s protegé and assumed lover. 

The down time they had all spent together had made everything worse. At first, it had started as a crush. The kid was cute and he called Jack ‘sir’ with a southern twang of sincerity that Jack immediately liked too much. Then he started to fill out, put on weight after regular meals, put on more muscle after heavy training sessions. Started to develop his own style, but retained that bratty persona Jack had loved about him in the first place. 

Loved? 

Yeah, loved. He was in love with Jesse McCree and it was pathetic, stupid and wrong, oh so wrong. Gabriel would kill him if he found out, or mock him… he wasn’t sure which was worse. To be disowned by a friend, or to be dragged by one. Either way, he knew for certain that if Gabriel found out that he harboured feelings for Jesse, then their relationship wouldn’t survive. It had outlasted wars, medical experiments, promotions, and hell, they’d even gotten past the whole statue ordeal - but if Gabriel knew that Jack was had fallen in love with Gabriel’s priority no.1, it would destroy them.

He was dragged back to the present situation when he heard the sound of footsteps approaching and he turned just in time to see Gabriel on the warpath. 

“Kid, if you don’t move your goddamn ass right now-” He started, only to be cut off by the sound of a chair scraping across the floor, and Jack looked to the source and saw Jesse, hands still under the chair, holding himself firmly to the seat as he attempted to maneuver himself across the room.

“What the fuck are you even gonna do about it?” Jesse retorted, pausing his chair-ride to give Gabriel a smug look. “You ain’t allowed to touch me, an’ I got a witness right there!” He yelled, pointing at Jack, and that was the one thing he had never wanted to happen. He didn’t know what had caused this fight; didn’t know he history of it, and now he was being dragged into it.

But Gabriel seemed to ignore Jack’s presence in the room, pushing past him and lunging for Jesse. It wasn’t like Gabriel to so blatantly disregard the rules. They both knew that they were not allowed to lay a hand on recruits in such a way. After dark, in downtime, what happened between the commander and his protegé was their own business but here, at lunchtime, in the cafeteria… Gabriel was about to make this Jack’s business, and he desperately wanted to avoid that.

“Gabe-” He started, only for Gabriel to glare at him.

“Don’t you even think about undermining me right now, Morrison. I’m going to kick his ass, and if you have a problem with how I treat my recruits, then I’ll kick your ass too,” Gabriel spat, fury apparent on his features and Jack couldn’t remember the last time he had ever seen Gabriel so genuinely angry. 

“Commander Morrison, y’ain’t gonna let him do this now, are ya, not to lil’ ol’ me?” Jesse called from across the room, the sound of his chair dragging across the floor getting louder as he frantically tried to escape the incoming charging bull that was Gabriel Reyes. 

And he was right, Jack couldn’t let it happen. He would file whole mountain of resulting paperwork if he had to, but he couldn’t allow Gabriel to attack Jesse. Thinking fast, he shoved his tablet under his arm before he reached out with his other, grabbing the hood dangling down Gabriel’s back, and instantly regretted it. The sound of his friend being choked rang out through the room, and Jesse went silent, the only audible sound being Gabriel gasping for air, his hands clamped around his neck. 

The silence lingered, Jack and Jesse both waiting for a reaction from Gabriel but none came. Instead, Gabriel lowered his hands from his neck, the redness obvious, a small indent around his neck and it looked painful, even for someone like Gabriel. He watched his friend for a look of betrayal, but it wasn't there, instead there was just a small, slightly chilling smile. 

“You know what, fuck it,” Gabriel mumbled, tugging his hoodie back to its place on his body before he shrugged. “You can have him. You can clean the brat up. He’s probably pissed himself or something, so have fun with your new pet, Jackie boy,” he spat, looking at Jack coolly as he started to stalk off. “I’m fucking done. Fuck this shit. If you’re going to return the brat to Blackwatch, make sure he’s presentable. I don’t want to see one crumb of food in his quarters. ”

Jack moved his mouth, but no sound came out. Instead he looked back and forth between Gabriel’s back and Jesse’s triumphant face. It wasn’t until Gabriel was fully gone that Jack realised he wasn’t kidding and his gaze slowly fell on a smug looking Jesse, who somehow seemed even more filthy than before, but at least he didn’t appear to have pissed his pants, so at least Gabriel was wrong about one thing. 

He took a cautious step towards Jesse, sliding his tablet out from under his armpit as he approached him. “You feel like telling me what that was all about?” Jack asked, kicking aside some fries. He didn’t want to stamp any of the food into the floor; didn’t want to make even more of a mess when he knew someone would have to clean up eventually. “Or are the contents of your argument top secret like everything else?” 

Jesse scoffed, and Jack found himself staring at the younger man, his face warming up. This was the first time he had ever been left alone with Jesse; the first time he had ever been in charge of him… not that he was really in charge. He knew Gabriel would return for Jesse sooner rather than later. He just needed to cool down, and Jack just had to keep Jesse out of trouble long enough. He could do that. A simple favour for an old friend. 

Still, his mind still went straight to places he wished it wouldn’t. He couldn’t stop himself from escalating the situation in his mind, so much so that before Jesse could even answer the question he had asked, his mind he already had Jesse face down on a table, his ass free for Jack to do with it whatever he wanted, and he wanted to do so many things; too many things. He didn’t even know the names for the shit he wanted to do to Jesse. 

“Are you even listenin’ to me?” Came a louder, more shrill voice and Jack blinked a few times before he realised Jesse had been talking to him. 

“What? Yes, of course I am,” Jack mumbled, holding his tablet in front of him and swiping it open to distract his thoughts just long enough for him to deal with the situation. 

“So I can use your shower then?” Jesse asked, getting to his feet, a waterfall of crumbs falling down the front of his body and Jack couldn’t help but stare. Jesse’s uniform fit him like a glove now, his trousers tight over his thighs, his shirt just as taut over his firm pectorals. 

Jack knew he was staring, but it was hard not to. Not only was the kid taller, but he was far more attractive than him. Jesse oozed this kind of carefree sex appeal that years of military training had drilled out of him - at least that's what he liked to think, that the military was to blame. Truth be told, he knew he had never really been sexy. And when it came to the bedroom, he was efficient at best. 

Jesse, on the other hand, well… He had heard enough from around the base to know he was a good lover. Whilst his old friend had never confirmed that he and Jesse were an item, Jack could read between the lines. Third party stories about Jesse were clearly stories about Jesse and Gabriel and vice versa. He wasn’t stupid, and at times, Gabriel insulted him by assuming he was. 

However, he had to remember that nothing about Jesse and Gabriel was ever confirmed. He needed to remember to treat Jesse like any other recruit; no special treatment for his best friend’s lover. 

No special treatment for the man he was certain he loved. 

He ran a hand through his hair, a tired sigh escaping his lips as he nodded. Maybe a few special privileges weren’t so ridiculous for an up and coming agent, such as using his own private shower. After all, Gabriel had told him to make sure Jesse was clean. Not one crumb, Gabriel had said. Whilst Gabriel wasn’t his boss, and boy did he have that in writing, he never liked to see his friend too annoyed. A large part of him wished he had been listening as Jesse was explaining, so he knew exactly what _had_ pushed Gabe over the edge, but he’d just been far too busy degrading Jesse in his mind.

“C’mon then,” Jack mumbled, shaking his head as he started to walk out of the room, Jesse hot on his tail. He couldn’t deal with walking behind him, so he made sure he kept in front, and at a reasonable distance. He had to admit the silence was awkward, but he had nothing to say; nothing he could think to discuss without seeming like an idiot. It was better that Jesse just thought of him as Strike Commander Morrison and chalked the uneasy silence up to disdain, much easier. 

-

“Shower is through there. You can use my toiletries, I guess,” Jack said with an exhausted tone, shrugging his own jacket off and hanging it on the designated hook. 

He could hear Jesse’s footsteps behind him, moving around the room, clearly examining what very few personal possessions Jack had on display before the bathroom door slid open with a thunk. Jack could do this. All he had to do was sit on the bed and read a book, review some files… play Jelly Bean Juicer even. Anything. Jesse would clean himself up and then leave. He would be back with Gabriel in less than thirty minutes.

He looked down at his watch, pressing a few buttons before he set a timer for half an hour. If Jesse wasn’t out of here before that, then he’d throw him out himself. Until then, he could spend thirty minutes alone with Jesse. He would be fine. 

That was, until a sock flew over his head.

Turning around, he saw Jesse leaning in the doorway, feet bare with the other sock in his hand, ready for firing. 

“McCree, why on- Look, you’ve already pissed off one commander today,” he mumbled, trying to sound grumpy but it was hard when Jesse was staring at him, off-white sock hanging limp from his fist. If this was anyone else, he’d accused them of flirting, but he knew Jesse; knew his expressions. Looking like he was fucking you with his eyes was just one of his default looks. 

“Hey, c’mon, I’m not trying to annoy you,” Jesse drawled, pinging the other sock across the room before he took his hat off and threw it onto the bed. “I need help,” he mumbled, draping himself dramatically between the two rooms. “I ain’t sure how your shower works.”

Jack took in a deep breath as he kicked off his own shoes, intent on climbing onto the bed, and at least making himself comfortable as Jesse showered. 

“Jack, c’mon, I’m not jokin’. I genuinely have no idea how to work it. The communal showers are different, they don’t got all these weird buttons,” Jesse said with an honest, confused tone and Jack felt it tug at his heart strings, and his dick. Yes, he may have had a few fantasies about teaching Jesse how to love; how to make love, and yes, he might have a slight kink for being the teacher in a sexual situation with Jesse... But he had never had fantasies about teaching him to use a shower. That was a bit too much like the beginning of a blue movie. “If you ain’t gonna help,’ Jesse said finally with a pout, ‘then I’m gonna jus’ break it, an’ it will be your fault.”

He watched as Jesse disappeared inside the bathroom, the door sliding shut. Jesse was smart, he could work out the shower by himself, Jack thought to himself as he grabbed his tablet computer and began swiping through documents. Jesse wasn’t stupid and how complicated could a shower be? After all, he was certain Gabriel had the same one in his room, and if he and Jesse were actually lovers, then surely Jesse had been in the shower. 

Swiping left and right, he paid very little attention to what was occurring on his screen. Instead, all he could concentrate on was the sound of Jesse loudly undressing, his heavy clothing hitting the tiled floor with an audible clunk. 

He could ignore it. He had been trained to deal with pressured situations; interrogation and torture… Okay, so he hadn’t exactly been trained in the last two, but Gabriel had told him about the training he put his recruits through, so really, it was as if he had personally done the course. 

Despite his thoughts, he found his eyes drifting over to the bathroom. 

No, he couldn’t do that to Gabriel. He needed to just ignore it. He resisted the urge to climb on the bed and flatten himself down to look through the glass door to the bathroom. He was above this; better than being a peeping tom. Even now thinking about it the thought of Gabriel’s reaction loomed. Just thinking it through felt like betrayal. 

Just as he had convinced himself that even thinking about Jesse in that way was basically high treason, the bathroom door slid open and Jesse poked his head through, a slightly embarrassed look on his face. 

“Okay, listen jokes aside, I have no idea how to turn your shower on, let alone change temperature or anythin’,” Jesse said with a meek voice and Jack could only exhale heavily, locking his tablet and setting it aside. 

He blinked hard, pinching the bridge of his nose before he started to walk towards the bathroom. “Okay, okay. I’ll sort it out,” he mumbled, trying to avert his eyes but it was impossible. By the basin stood Jesse in all his naked glory, his hands covering his crotch and a slight redness in his cheeks, and he felt relieved that Jesse felt as uncomfortable as he did. It made it easier; made it simple. He would turn on the shower and leave him alone.

Only of course, that was never going to happen. As soon as he turned the shower on, he jumped, annoyed that the water had splashed onto his body, but even worse, onto his covered feet. If it was one thing he hated, it was wet socks. 

“It’s all yours,” he mumbled, moving to the counter and leaning against it as he removed his socks, a disgusted noise leaving his mouth as he threw them on the floor. So distracted was he with the socks, that he hadn’t noticed Jesse climbing into the shower; hadn’t noticed his naked form walk right past him.

It was for the best, he decided as he glanced in the mirror, relieved that the hot water from the shower had already steamed up the glass panels; shrouding Jesse’s naked body from him. It had to stop. He couldn’t do this; couldn’t harbour such feelings for someone who was so unattainable. He couldn’t keep doing this to himself. He needed to stop chasing impossibilities. 

“Hey, Jack?” yelled Jesse over the sound of running water and Jack grumbled slightly, staring at his reflection in the mirror; watching as condensation took over that as well. “You uh, you got some conditioner? Ain’t none in here that I can see.”

Jack puffed out his cheeks, exhaling slowly as he pulled open the mirrored cabinet, grabbing a new bottle of conditioner. He was certain there was some inside the shower, but he hardly used it, so maybe he had run out. He didn’t know; didn’t particularly care.

Busy questioning his own toiletries, he failed to really think as Jesse opened the shower door to grab the bottle from him. Before he could realise what was happening, he was in the shower, under a stream of hot water, gasping for air, the shock knocking the wind out of him.

Realisation sunk in slower than he would have thought and suddenly, Jesse had him pinned against the tiled wall, his mouth on his, and Jack couldn’t help but relent; couldn’t help but submit to Jesse’s dominance. His arms were soon pinned above his head, one of Jesse’s large hands gripping his wrists as the other slid under his already soaked undershirt, feeling out his muscles and just the feeling of his fingers running over his abs was enough to cause a stirring in his trousers. 

He needed to stop it before it went any further, but he could do nothing except surrender to Jesse’s overbearing presence and it felt so good; so hot to have Jesse kiss him, his tongue almost suffocating him as his hand explored his body, lingering on his nipples in a way that made him moan into the kiss, his cheeks burning as he realised just how willing he was.

Jesse pulled away just enough to speak, but his grip on Jack’s wrists tightened and he couldn’t help but feel like a cornered animal. It was stupid to be intimidated by someone younger than him; someone lower down the rankings but the way Jesse was looming over him had him feeling so small; so insignificant. He knew the expression on his face was as submissive as it could be and it wasn’t even intentional. 

“I knew you wanted me,” Jesse mumbled, letting go of Jack’s wrists to grab his face, tilting it back and forth to examine him, like he was judging whether Jack was worth his time; worth his attention. He silently prayed that he was, and he felt a deep shame that he was so desperate for Jesse that he was willing to be examined like an animal. “But I wonder what exactly you’re wantin’.”

Jack licked his lips, maintaining eye contact with Jesse. He couldn’t lie, there would be no point. He couldn’t push Jesse away now and claim he didn’t want that, not even he was that good. So he glanced down between them, laying his eyes on Jesse’s stomach, glancing down the muscles; the body hair… but his face was quickly tilted up before he could get an eyeful. 

“That was a question,” Jesse mumbled, taking a step closer to Jack, his wet naked body so close… but Jack knew better than to touch. “Tell me what you want, or I’m gonna have to start assumin’.”

Jack shook his head, letting Jesse turn his face to the side as he leaned in to press kisses along the column of his neck and Jack found himself sucking on his lower lip; suppressing the noises that were so desperate to escape. Jesse couldn’t have known his weak spots, but here he was, coming undone from just a few words and a series of well placed kisses. He remained as silent as he could, but as Jesse’s mouth wandered lower, it was growing increasingly more difficult. 

“Lemme see those tits of yours,” Jesse mumbled against his skin, tugging Jack’s shirt up without waiting for an answer and all he could do was stand there, leaning against the tiled wall as Jesse ran his hands over his chest, pressing down and admiring his pectorals; his sculpted muscles from years of training. He had a nice body, he knew that, but he rarely had an opportunity to flaunt it. He thought of it as functional rather that fuckable. 

But he couldn’t deny the way Jesse’s mouth was so eagerly exploring his torso; couldn’t deny the way Jesse was murmuring words directly against his skin about how hot Jack’s body was; how he couldn’t wait to fuck him. He went to pull his shirt over his head, and Jesse let him get that far, the fabric barely clearing his head before he stopped him, leaving the shirt pulled taught across his back, making his chest stick out a little. From the look on Jesse’s face, that was the intention and Jesse moved his lips to Jack’s shoulders, kissing the skin around the fabric before he ran his fingers over it. 

“Lift your arms up again for me,” Jesse said in a low voice, sliding his hands back to Jack’s waist, holding him still as he pushed their bodies together. “C’mon, I wanna taste those sexy pits.”

Jack could feel his body shaking as Jesse ‘helped’ him lift his arms, instantly diving in and inhaling deeply. Was this how Jesse was with Gabriel? He couldn’t imagine his friend liking this kind of thing, hell, he wasn’t sure if he liked it himself. His cheeks were burning each time Jesse inhaled; each time he felt the wetness of Jesse’s tongue against his body hair, but he couldn’t bring himself to stop it. There was just something about Jesse that made him feel so desperate.

Jesse moved back to his face, gripping his chin with one hand and Jack knew instantly that he would do anything for him; anything to earn his approval. He found himself staring into his deep brown eyes, getting lost for a moment as they both stood there, panting under a steady stream of water, Jesse’s dick hard and obvious in the corner of his Jack’s vision, his own still trapped in his wet trousers.

Not for long, he thought as he leaned in and captured Jesse’s lips in a kiss again, his passion for the younger man overflowing as he pressed their bodies together, his hands sliding between their bodies to undo his trousers. He barely had the belt out of its notch before Jesse took over and practically ripped them open with little finesse, shoving them down just enough with even less grace. 

He felt Jesse’s eyes on his dick; felt him judging him, as though there was a chance that he wouldn’t be up to standard. A man like Jesse McCree couldn’t possibly have high standards, if he actually had them at all, but there was something about the idea of Jesse rejecting him that forced a rush of heat through his body, settling in his cheeks.

“Oh I’m gonna fuck you _so_ hard. Turn around. Now,” Jesse commanded, his voice dripping in dominance, and he grabbed the bottle of conditioner Jack had brought in. Jack had barely repositioned himself before he felt Jesse’s fingers pushing inside, stretching him so easily. He wanted this; wanted to feel Jesse’s big cock filling him up. He was desperate enough to not care how it happened, in fact he would have settled for anyone and just imagined it was Jesse.

But it just so happened to actually be Jesse fucking him open with blunt, confident fingers. Jesse McCree. The man who filled most of his conscious thoughts; most, fuck, _all_ of his dreams. The very man who made his body ache with need and now just being prepared by him; his body being possessed this way was enough to almost push him to the brink. 

Jesse wouldn’t have to ask twice; Jack was willing to do whatever he wanted him to do.

“Mm, go on, beg for it,” Jesse mumbled as he lined up his cock, one hand resting on Jack’s hip and he couldn’t stop himself from pushing back. He had wanted this for so long; was so desperate for Jesse to fuck him into any surface. He just needed him inside him. He would beg, he didn’t care. 

“Please, Jesse,” he said, turning his head into the shower stream, spitting out any water on his lips. “I need you to fuck me, please, just fuck me.” The fingers hadn’t been enough, Jack knew exactly what he needed. He’d caught glimpses of it before now, but seeing it in the shower, hard and wet just had his hole aching for it.

Jesse chuckled to himself as he spread Jack’s ass with one hand, the other gripping his dick and slowly, he lined himself up, rubbing the cleft of Jack’s ass with the tip before he pressed inside. “Mm, look at how well you’re openin’ up for me,” he mumbled, and Jack could feel the head pressing into him.

He could only nod in acknowledgement, letting out a low moan as Jesse pushed further, his body being stretched to accommodate his cock in the most delicious way; a way that made Jack pant heavily, his sweat washed away instantly by the shower. 

“Tell me how much you love my big fat dick inside you,” Jesse hissed, and Jack felt a chill down his spine before Jesse adjusted himself, the water slamming into his back as Jesse started to move. 

“I...I love it,” Jack admitted, a defeated tone in his voice as he let Jesse push him against the tiles, pounding into him with little regard, setting an almost punishing pace but Jack didn’t care. This was how he wanted it; how he needed it. “Wanted this… for so long,” he choked out, panting heavily into the steam filled air.

He couldn’t hold back, every time he opened his mouth either a moan came out, or a few words that would have serious repercussions if they left this room but he just couldn’t stop. He whispered against the tiles about how much he wanted Jesse; how much he loved him. 

“Yeah? Mmm, I shoulda guessed you’d want me, I always thought you looked like a slut, I bet it gets you real hard thinkin’ ‘bout me fuckin’ your best friend,” Jesse said, his breath hot on Jack’s ear and all he could do was moan in agreement because yes, he thought about Jesse fucking Gabriel. Far more than he would ever admit. The idea of the Gabriel he knew, lying down and taking this street punk’s dick was his secret go-to; guaranteed to get him off. 

But he didn’t want to dwell on that; didn’t want to tarnish this memory with any more guilt.

So he pushed back a little, moaning as he pressed his forehead into the tiles, his own breath smacking him back in the face.

“Don’t stop,” Jack begged, scraping his nails against the tiles as Jesse fucked into him harder; faster. He had needed this for so long and he could feel his dick dripping as he teetered on the verge of his orgasm, each rough grab of his body pushing him closer.

Then he felt Jesse’s hand slide into his hair and grip it, yanking his head back as he held Jack upright to thrust into him, a low moan escaping his lips as he felt Jesse’s other hand slide to his front, gripping his dick roughly. “Look at this, is this all for me? You gonna come for me? Come with my big dick in your tight ass?” Jesse mumbled as he rested his chin on Jack’s shoulder, his facial hair rubbing his raw skin. 

Jack nodded, his hands shaking as he tried to reach behind himself; tried to grab Jesse’s body and hold him close. He knew Jesse’s past, knew how rough his life had been and he could feel that in the way he fucked; foreceful and relentless but it felt so good. No one had dared ever fuck him like this. 

“Tell me you love it. Tell me how much of a degenerate you are, wanting a guy like me to fuck you like this,” Jesse mumbled as he played with Jack’s cock, his fingers curiously examining his dick and he could feel Jesse’s eyes on him; staring at his body and the way the water cascaded down it; “You’re so hot, I bet no one has ever fucked you like this before.”

He shook his head, breathing out a noise of agreement as he felt Jesse’s hand slip lower, cradling his balls as he continued to fuck him. He was right; no one had ever fucked him like this. 

“I love it,” Jack gasped out, hands scrabbling behind himself desperately until he felt the meat of Jesse’s thigh, digging his in as he felt his climax creeping up his body, his cheeks tingling as he closed his eyes and tilted his head back, giving Jesse the opportunity to kiss his neck but instead he used the chance to bite Jack as he shuddered against him. “Fuck… I just love... You,” he whimpered, but his words were lost in the sound of the water; the sound of Jesse snapping his hips against him, thrusting into him hard. He felt his whole body tremble as he came, his hands frantically searching for something to hold, but Jesse was leaning away, his eyes on Jack’s ass as he fucked it and just being ignored like that was enough to make him moan shamelessly into the stream of water. 

“Mmm, yeah, I bet you do,” Jesse whispered, his voice low and Jack could only let Jesse move his body; let him push him against the wall again. He didn’t care that he was being yanked around like a rag doll and the only response he offered was to raise his leg, his knee sliding against the tiles as Jesse took the hint and slid his hand under Jack’s knee, holding him upright as he thrust up into him, and Jack couldn’t find any more words, his throat raw as he weakly let out a groan each time Jesse fucked into him.

He felt Jesse slip his cock out, and he lowered his leg, arching his back and pushing his ass back towards Jesse. It was only a moment later that he heard Jesse loudly moaning into the shower stream, dipping his cock in and out of Jack’s hole. He wasn’t even sure what he was saying; couldn’t make out the words as Jesse slowed down, pulling his cock out slowly and whatever came out of him was soon washed away and all he was left with was Jesse slapping his ass with his dick as he finished himself off.

“Fuck, that was good,” Jesse mumbled as he leaned against him and pressed his forehead between Jack’s shoulders, breathing heavily against his skin and Jack swallowed hard, a large lump forming in his throat as he realised what he had done.

He shook his head, slinking away from Jesse. He refused to make eye contact as he picked up his trousers and slipped out of the shower, unable to stop himself from stumbling around slightly, his mind as foggy as the atmosphere. He could hear the sound of Jesse washing himself and for a moment, he was certain that it hadn’t happened; that it had been some weird fantasy in his head or vivid daydream. 

But as he moved back into his room, he couldn’t help but catch a glimpse of his neck. A reddening mark an obvious momento for what had just occurred. That and his disheveled, soaking wet appearance, stretched asshole and aching body.

He wasn’t sure how long he had been staring at himself; how long he had been lost in a pit of his own self loathing when Jesse whistled at him, and he slowly turned with a neutral expression on his face. It almost cracked as he looked Jesse up and down, his dick barely covered by the small hand towel he had chosen, and the only other thing he wore was a smirk. 

“Look, we don’t gotta read into this. Just’a bit of fun, y’know?” He drawled, rubbing his groin with the towel as he spoke, and Jack could only nod.

He didn’t want to read into it. He wanted to be cool about it, but he felt unsaid thoughts weighing him down. 

“You can get some clean clothes from the second drawer,” he mumbled, gesturing to his dresser before he looked back in the mirror, watching Jesse through the reflection.

“Appreciate it if you didn’t tell Gabe about it.” Jesse continued as he rifled through Jack’s gear, and Jack sighed before nodding again. Of course. Telling Gabriel it had happened would be as unprofessional as doing the act in the first place. “An’ y’know, stuff said in the heat of the moment, s’just that.” 

And all Jack could do was nod again, taking a seat on the bed and he could feel everything crashing down around him; like he was suddenly falling apart. Had Jesse heard what he had said? Jack had assumed Jesse had missed it; too busy on fucking him to hear Jack admit his feelings for him but he could see Jesse staring at him; could tell he wanted answers, or at least acknowledgement beyond a bob of the head. 

But soon enough, Jesse jumped to the wrong conclusions and started to hasten himself, mumbling under his breath as he pulled on a clean shirt and a fresh pair of grey sweatpants. Jack hated himself for many reasons, hated himself for letting Jesse do that, hated himself for loving it and he especially hated that even after Jesse had said it was just a bit of fun, he found himself staring at Jesse; staring at the clear outline of his dick through the thick fabric. 

Letting Jesse fuck him hadn’t rid him of his thoughts; hadn’t magically deleted all his feelings for him. 

_”A bit of fun_. The word echoed throughout his head, it only getting louder as he watched Jesse walk to the door and slip out. He couldn't even bring himself to hate Jesse for fucking him; for cheating on Gabriel. He was young, impressionable and there was no way Gabriel would blame the kid for anything. He’d let Jesse get away with murder, probably had. 

He doubted Jesse would be stupid enough to mention it to Gabriel. 

“Just a bit of fun,” he whispered to himself as he stood up. That’s all it was, and he knew that was all it ever would be.

**Author's Note:**

> apparently, a lot of people like to use Tresemmé conditioner as lube but i didn't want to name a brand in the fic. anyway u can find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/torraroch) and [tumblr](https://tordarroch.tumblr.com/) if u wanna yell at me for whatever. thank you for reading.


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